LIFE IN A FORGOTTEN WORLD

 One day I was reading an article which mentioned that if you want to know the ground reality or a glimpse of India visit a village. 

I thought, what a utopian sentence it is. That’s not at all true! 

But as soon as I visited a village my perspective changed. 

A few months back, I visited my grandma's home to spend a week over there and experience a life other than my monotonous eat, sleep, study, repeat one. Also to experience the ground reality.

 

As soon as I reached her place ….

I observed that everything happened on a fixed time, the life was quite disciplined there.

 

All the women of the house used to wake up around four o'clock in the morning. Then they used to visit a nearby handpump and get drinking water for the entire day (after waiting in a long line).

Then they came back finished the daily chores, prepared meals for their husbands and kids. Then packed some food for their husbands. After that, they cleaned the buffaloes and collected some milk. Then visited the field to finish off the entire fieldwork and also collected fuelwood for cooking food on the hearth. In the evening, all the ladies of the nearby houses visited and talked.

The men of the house were the bread winners. They left home at five o'clock in the morning via a local train, reached the factory site , finished their tiresome work and came back home around eight o'clock in the night.

The children woke up early in the morning,  bath, have food and then go out for playing. They used to make mud houses, play with chickens and take the goats for a walk. In the evening they sung different poems in a chorus, played with the rabbits and later on bring vegetables and grocery for dinner. Also, visited fields with their mothers.

 

Day 1 

VISIT A FARM 

The plan was to visit a farm with my aunt and cousins. This day she packed two extra chapatis with ghee and some pickle embedded inside it for me. The farm was three kilometres away from the house. During that 20 minutes short journey I observed a few things:

 

·          Despite various toilets, children and other villagers used to defecate openly.

 

·          Manual scavenging was still prevalent,  people from so-called low caste were  victimized and were subjected to discrimination.

 

·         Litter was thrown openly; cleanliness was a distant dream. (Swachh Bharat mission faded away, maybe!)

 

·         Water was unfit for drinking and ponds were filled with algal bloom. 

 

·         Unmetalled roads were present and mosquito breeding grounds were quite prevalent.

I reached the farm. It was a lush green beautiful farm. I cannot express the level of peace I felt there, it was amazing. I felt like staying there for years. I felt like I am the happiest person in the world.

This was the only place where both men and women were working equally and were working together. Some of them were ploughing the field, some were making humus like mixture by mixing cow dung with leftover plant residue. Some of them were burning the waste near the farm. (stubble burning, one of the major reasons behind air pollution!)

 

Their tensed faces were pondering the same question again and again :

 

"What will happen if there is no rain? Our produce wouldn't be up to the mark, it might lead to crop failure. How we will feed our family? How we will repay the loan?" 

 

They continued working there till the sunset, during the harvest season they worked till late night as well.

But,

Their hard work does not pay off every time. They suffer from crop failures, pest attacks, low prices in the market which leads to lower productivity and reduces their profits. 

To make the ends meet they need to take loans through an informal source, which means paying huge interest. Slowly, all these things pushes them into the vicious cycle of poverty.

 

Just one day in the farm and I could imagine all the hardships that a farmer go through and I felt blessed that at least I don’t have to work this hard to eat thrice a day. 

Still, we are never grateful for our blessed lives. 

Always, remember that there's always someone who's suffering more than you and still he/she is surviving. Never lose hope. Find a reason to keep going. 

 

The day passed, we finished the work and came back home.

Everyone went to take a short nap except the women , they went straightway in the kitchen to prepare dinner.

 

Then everyone dined together and this exercise of commensality was constant.

(Which is missing in urban areas, where everyone eats according to their timings.) 

 

Day 2 

SARPANCH MEETING 

I suddenly woke up due to the whispering of some women. They were discussing the marriage of a fellow villager's daughter.

I overheard them saying - "How Kamlesh will afford his daughter's wedding? He is a marginal farmer."

Later, few men and women gathered along with Kamlesh's family and decided to apprise the sarpanch about this issue.

 

(It's interesting to observe how the entire village collectively decided to help Kamlesh as if he was their relative. Such unity is missing in urban areas. Do you agree?)

 

It was afternoon, the sun was overhead and sarpanch arrived. He sat beneath a big banyan tree and listened to the whole issue keenly. Few villagers gave different ideas about how they can help Kamlesh. 

 

Conclusion:

Raju (tailor) will stitch a wedding dress for Kamlesh's daughter for free. Sarpanch and other ward members will arrange the catering. Rest of the villagers will collect money for dowry.

 

(It's shocking that people were discussing dowry, as if, it is the most important element of a marriage. More shocking is that, this thing was being discussed in front of the sarpanch.!! Who is the guardian of laws and should stand against social evil , in a village.)

 

 

Finally, enough money was collected and everything went smoothly. 

 

Day 3 

WEDDING DAY

 

This is Kamlesh's house. It's looking quite dull at the moment.

Whereas, in the evening it was looking beautiful. Kids were dancing and women were singing their favourite Rajasthani songs (known as Geet) in chorus. 

Everyone was enjoying the night, they were sitting together and talking about the food to be cooked, also about the groom and rest were talking about the evergreen topic "politics".

Every person in the village attended all the customs and ceremonies. There was a huge crowd, the whole house was filled with giggles, laughter and beautiful faces.

We danced a lot and had decent food in the evening.

 

When I was talking to that girl (bride) she said - 

" If my father would have made this much efforts for collecting money for my education, then today the story would have been different. Well, life for women is not easy in this village. Marriage is the most important affair."

 

I asked her - "Are you happy?"

 

She said - " Everyone is. That's enough." (said with a Fake smile)

 

Then everyone bid her farewell and went back to their respective homes.

I slept on the terrace gazing the stars. 

And I was thinking that how that girl's life will change completely and her dreams will be buried forever. 

The bitter truth is - " It'll take another century for making gender equality a new normal in rural areas. Situation is quite grim here."

 

Day 4 

MAKING OF A BUNNY HOUSE 

Suddenly, I woke up in the middle of the night due to a power outage in the village. I was sweating badly and saw everyone in the house was awake except the kids. It was difficult to sleep the entire night. Women continuously used a hand fan to let the kids sleep peacefully. 

Somehow, I managed to sleep.

My aunt told me that this happens a lot, we are used to it now.

(I wondered that it's so difficult for me and my friends to imagine life without electricity and here it’s completely normal.!!!! Here, this basic necessity is a luxury and for us its nothing extraordinary.

Next day woke up at 5 o'clock in the morning. Helped my aunt and sisters to run errands and finished the household chores.

 

The day passed I was sitting and talking to my grandmother, meanwhile, I overheard a few kids talking :

 

Chinu to other kids - "Look at these buffaloes they have a shelter which is protecting them from sunlight but these poor rabbits don’t have any such shelter." (Remorsefully)

 

Sahil said -"Let's make one for them!"  (Excitedly)

 

Raju said - " Are you mad?! We cannot make such a huge shelter." (In a funny tone)

 

Chinu said: "But we don’t have to make such a big shelter, rabbits are smaller than buffaloes. Stupid!"

 

( Everyone started laughing )

 

(Did you notice how compassionate these kids are that they were concerned about those rabbits? Whereas, we don’t have a minute to think about other human beings, forget about animals. We don’t care what someone is going through, we are just living a selfish life restricted to our expectations and desires.)

 

Then, I went outside and we planned out how we will be making a small bunny house. Everyone collected bricks and prepared a mixture of cement and water.

Everyone worked hard to make this house:

Day 5 

VISIT THE MARKET 

After a 10 minutes short walk we reached this market. 

Brittle walls, faded coloured gates, unmetalled road, group of geriatric beings sipping tea, the smell of fresh samosa and kachori, multicoloured bangles and jewellery, giggles of children and herd of cows roaming here and there; defined this market.

 

I noticed one shopkeeper who was very old, he was selling tea. 

I went near and asked him for one cup of tea.

 

He vaguely said - "Give me 2 minutes."

Then while making the tea he asked - " You're not from this village right?" 

I said - " Why ?" 

He said - "Because since years I haven't seen any lady coming here and buying tea without a veil." 

I said - "Oh! Have I done something wrong?" 

He said: "No, daughter. You’ve done the right thing. You did not follow the other women and dressed up the way you wanted. That’s good. All the other women are afraid to do so."

 (I smiled and went) 

I was shocked to know that, NOT covering the face was a big deal and if someone is not following this custom then that person is considered as a revolutionary. This is a small thing for us but if we think about the women living there then I just imagined a "caged life". A life where you don’t have the freedom to dress up the way you wanted!!  Extremely difficult to imagine.

Also, it's not the right thing to say that people don't support, if you're a deviant because here unexpectedly that old man was happy seeing someone who isn't abiding by the ancient societal rules and regulations. 

People welcome change, just have the courage to adapt according to your will NOT according to society's will ; you'll overcome chaos.

 

Then I went home wondering all this, shared my experiences with my cousins , had dinner and slept. 

 

 Day 6

 

CHIT-CHAT

 

It was a normal day. After doing the routine work everyone started preparing Dal Baati Choorma for dinner. (As it was my last day here, so it was my small treat.) 

 

We had dinner together, watched TV and then went out for a short evening walk.

 

We came back and decided to make tea and sit together and talk, just a normal chit chat.

 

So, I started the conversation. I started telling them about my experiences of the past five days.

 

·           Starting from day one, my life has been filled with amazing experiences. Each day was different from another.

 

·         Starting from visiting the farm. It was a completely different world from what we see normally. There people were working hard to grow crops . 

     

·         Contrastingly, in urban areas people are more into clearing the forests than growing them.

 

·         I have realized that farmers are the most hard working beings and despite of all the government initiatives they remain unbenefited. They work day in and day out to make their ends meet. 

·         During crisis its difficult for them to arrange money and make things work.

 

·          Well, working in the farm requires mental and physical fitness. That day I worked a lot in the farm and because of this tiresome activity I could sleep peacefully that night.

 (All the sleep issues and insomnia faded away!)

 

·         I also realized that one of the most important things required to implement all the government schemes is behavioral change , proper identification of the beneficiaries and awareness about the importance of a particular scheme. It's important to make the public realize the importance and benefits of it.

 

·         Talking about the second day, experience of attending sarpanch meeting and collecting money for Kamlesh's daughter was another heartwarming experience.

 

·          Each and every villager came forward to help , despite their personal problems. They contributed , ignoring their own financial issues. Such equality and community culture is rare these days. Everyone was equally happy after organizing the wedding and equally sad while bidding Rani (Kamlesh's daughter) a farewell.

 

 

·         But, I think if this much was done for educating his daughter then Rani would have been the heroine of her life not a victim of gender inequality.

     

·         Still, the word "consent" is is a distant dream when it comes to marriage. Nobody ask what the girl want? Nobody care about what she wants. The sad part is that a girl does everything considering her family's happiness and her family does everything considering their own happiness.

 

·          The minimal availability of basic things (electricity, water, food etc.) paints a grim picture of "life in a village".

 

·          Its not easy to live without fulfilling the basic needs.

·          Its difficult when you have to eat less in order to let your family eat peacefully. 

·          Its difficult to wake up in the middle of the night due to outage and make sure that your kids are sleeping peacefully. 

·         It's difficult to wake up before sunrise and fetch water from a handpump. 

·         It's difficult to not able to study to take of younger siblings.

·         It's difficult to work hard the entire year on a farm and couldn’t grow enough produce to get a good return.

·          I salute them. They are the real heroes.

 

 

·         I learnt that it's very important to be compassionate towards everyone in life.  Whether, plants, animals or human beings.  No matter what we are going through never misbehave, you never know what they're struggling from.

 

·         Lastly, life isn't about earning a lot of money and enjoying the luxury of expensive things. But it's about living a content life which is filled with real experiences.

 

·          This is possible only when we break the bubble of virtual reality (social media), where we are impersonating a completely different personality to grab attention, to gain followers. And in reality, we all are depressed, lost and very lonely.

 

·          Life is about living it NOT showing off that we are living it.

 

·         We need to learn, we need to experience things, we should enjoy our culture, our heritage, the lost part of our country(village).

 

 Everyone was listening keenly and was bored of my long lecture.

At the end, they said - "Regardless of all the troubles, we're happy."

 

Kids slept during the conversation. After a few minutes, everyone slept.

 

Then, next day I went back to my home with memorable experiences that I will cherish life long.

 

 So…

 

If you also feel depressed and need a break in life. Then visit a village instead of visiting foreign countries, I guarantee you will come back with real experiences and I bet you'll love your life more. And you'll be kind and compassionate towards everyone.

 

Let's live life for real!

And stop pretending to live it!